I hear her, she is off in the distance, but her voice gets powerful...Increasing the urgency faintly, then more vigorous as she bellows, over and over.
Closing my eyes fixedly, I pretend I don't hear her and try to return to the slumber that was once embracing me. Startling me awake again, she will not let go, anxiously dragging me down that dark path.
Eyes swollen from another night of tears, amidst the despair of always returning to this place of grief that holds me down. Taunting me with memories and the sadness that surrounds me, while stealing that glimmer of hope that was once inside of me.
At last, the long night is over and the sunlight creeps through the blinds offering its hope for another day. She continues to urge me in another direction. "It's safe here, with this sadness" she coaxes, "free from judgement, accepting you as you are, broken pieces still trying to rebuild."
But let go, I shriek, this time is different, finally I am stronger than that oppressor that controls my thoughts. Hope does still exist and is there with me each day, like a faithful friend, reminding me of the life out there.
Listening closely I begin to hear the birds croon their merry songs as the sun warms my inner soul. I can breathe again, I can smile again, I am ready to move forward,
I found hope.